Beep Beep Beep

...We interrupt your regularly scheduled test pattern to conduct our weekly emergency by the Nat'l Test Broadcast System.

This is only an emergency; repeat, this is only an emergency. In the event of an actual test, you are instructed to conduct all daily routines in a normal fashion. Otherwise, please resume a fruitless panic until further notice.

This concludes our emergency by the Nat'l Test Broadcast System...

BM